Being raised Catholic

Oh My! That was a trip!
My head was really screwed up!
I thought that if I turned my head to look at the back of the church that I would go to hell. Cause I was turning my head to God.
and if I was praying and my fingers were not perfectally correct I was praying to the devil.
The things what was implanted in my head, for a little child! wow
Can eat meat on fridays! The one day, ring ring..hey the pope said it is ok we will not go to hell if we eat meat on fridays!
These are just some things that happened to me as a kid.

I am what is considered a cradle Catholic. In the beginning, I was taught that God loved me and Jesus loved the little children. Then comes third grade........and the sacrament of penance. Then I went on to believe that God only loved the perfect little children, and this did not include me. I was in the confessional more than not, LOL!!!

Later, going through the motions because some how this made you a better person, I began to know that I was a sinner and I belonged in church, because church is for the sinners right?

After growing a little older, I then felt I wasn't even good enough to be in this religion, I felt that everyone in the church was better than me, I never really fit in anyway. My mother and sister are hard core Catholics and I believe they have actually become fanatics. The fear oozes out of my poor sister's pores. They have scared me. I do not mean to put anything down about the Catholic faith, this is a beautiful religion, but I find it unbending and I do not like the fact that they teach of a vengeful God. I do not like the fact that you can't pick your nose a certain way without it being a sin. LOL!!!

I really like where I am now, I feel loved by God and become emotional when I hear any preachings on this subject. Over forty years of God punishing me and giving me acne as a teenager to keep me humble can be hard to break free from, but I am slowly and surely healing. Reading what a lot of you good people have written on this site, Sylvia's books and JOS have steered me in the right direction. I have felt more love in the last year than I have collectively in 47 years previously.

Thanks for letting me spiel my guts, Diane

Aw Diane thanks for letting us in on your history.
I feel a big ol' gnostic group hug coming on!!!!
God=LOVE!

Thanks for sharing your story with us Diane, and thank god you can help spread the word that God is love.

From 10-13 I was raised Catholic...Glad that is over....I'm not one to knock anyone's religion but yeah..that one is not for me...lol

BIG HUGS!!

Stacy